Week 1 Home!!!

May 30, 2012

We arrived in Chicago on Wednesday around 12pm and at approximately 1240pm on Wednesday May 23, 2012 Konnor cleared customs and officially became a United States citizen.  WhooooHooooo!!!!!!  

It is just so hard to believe that after everything we have been through that this is really happening.  I think that it is just starting to sink in that he is really ours and noone is going to take him away.  After years of struggling with infertility you kinda start to live on the edge of a "when is the next shoe gonna drop" pessimistic view of things.  The whole time we were in China I would just look at Konnor and keep telling Mark, "he's really ours."  I still have a hard time believing that they are letting us be the parents of this amazing child.  I am not really sure what we did to deserve such a blessing, but I can assure you that blessed is what we are.  Just in the 2 weeks he has been with us we have already started to see him make huge advances.  He now walks with holding fingers (much more steady than when we first got him), he started pulling himself up to a standing position about 4 days after we got him and just 2 days later he figured out how to sit himself back down from a standing position.  Yesterday he was walking and let go of one of my hands and took 2 steps with just holding on with one hand.  I have a feeling our days until he starts walking unassisted are numbered : )  We have a little work to do on his fine motor skills, but overall he is doing amazingly well.

He did well on the 14 hour flight home.  He just took short 90 minute naps and played inbetween.  I tell you what though I had more people come up and touch him on the plane than the whole time we were in China!  Seriously people quit touching my overstimulated child!!!  It was kinda sweet though, because in China alot of the people would stare at Konnor's cleft, but on the plane all the Asian people were obsessed with if he was warm enough.  This one lady came up to him several times and if he was sleeping she would adjust his blanket to cover him more (then he would proceed to move it back to where he wanted it : ) and there was an elderly gentleman in the row behind us that kept trying to give us his blanket.  I had to keep showing him that between what we brought and what the flight attendants brought us he had like 4 blankets.  He really didn't fuss to much at all until we got on the plane from Chicago to Springfield.  By this time we had been traveling for almost 24 hrs and he was done with a capital D!  He screamed like I have never heard the entire 45 minutes from the time we boarded until we walked off the plane.  Thankfully everyone on board was so understanding.  We were greeted at the airport by both Mark and I's parents and our wonderful cousin Holly was there with her husband Larry to take pictures to capture this moment for us.

After our little meltdown on the plane Konnor was much happier.  We got home and introduced him to our dog Baxter.  Thankfully Konnor is not scared of him and Baxter is doing wonderfully with him. Baxter gets very worried when Konnor is crying and tries to go over to him and give little kisses.  Usually Konnor doesn't mind unless he is already in total meltdown mode.  Baxter is already learning to get out of the way fast when Konnor is playing or you get bashed on the head with a stacking cup.  Baxter just moves a little further away, but keeps on watching him.  Earlier today Konnor was laying down for a nap and when Baxter came in the room he looked for him, then circled the playpen and sniffed it, came up on our bed and peered over the edge to look at Konnor before finally laying down.  It was so sweet.  I anticipate these two getting into loads of trouble together.

He did so well in China, but we knew that coming home it would be a struggle to get him onto the new time zone.  What we failed to anticipate was that moving into yet another environment would trigger his grief reaction.  We wondered at how well his transition went in China, but truthfully we just considered ourselves one of the lucky families and didn't give it much more thought.  We think that once we got home into yet another new environment after such a long travel experience that he finally started to really grieve the loss of his previous life.  I know I talked about this in another post, but we do have to keep in mind that his life in the orphanage is all he has ever known.  We have moved him into a new environment with new food, new smells, new toys, new textures on his clothes and new people.  Everything is new to him and right now his only constant is Mark and I.  It is actually a really good thing that he felt attached enough to his previous life that he is missing it now.  It is heartbreaking to watch his sadness, but I know that in the end it will be good for him to acknowledge these emotions (as much as a 1 yr old can anyway).  

Right now we are really struggling with sleep patterns.  Konnor is having alot of night terrors.   For those of you that don't know, night terrors are common when children (any child, not just adopted children) have a major life change.  The child will usually wake screaming, but they aren't really awake.  When he wakes he has the most heart wrenching scream.  I swear you would think we were torturing him.  You can tell by the look on his face that he is completely terrified.  He reaches for us as if he wants us, but seems overwhelmed by his new environment (he is constantly looking around as if he is trying to find something familiar).  Even though he reaches for us once we pick him up he arches, hits, kicks and pinches.  We have actually found that when he is having a night terror the best thing to do is to lay him on the floor next to us and just talk to him and rub his back/stomach.  He calms himself down alot faster when he self soothes and we walk away with alot less bruises.  This is also leading to him being a little sensitive about other people touching him.  We were originally limiting it to just Mark and I holding him with Grandparents holding him for just a couple minutes at a time.  If there is any fussing then he comes right back to Mama and Baba.  We have decided in the last few days that we are going back to just Mark and I holding him.  We are also limiting touching by other people.  He seems to have alot more night terrors on days when there are other people fussing with him.  We are trying to make sure that he has us as his security blanket until he feels ready to branch out.  Right now we are having a couple of visitor free days so that he can just have some time to settle into life with just Mama, Baba, Konnor and Baxter.   Mark and I are really struggling with the sleep deprivation.  Sometimes his night terrors will last up to 4 hours before he can get back into a restful sleep.  It wouldn't be so bad except that Mark and I have both been sick since we got home.   Right now Mark and I are just taking turns napping thru the day.  We will work it out, but in the meantime there is an awful lot of coffee being consumed in this house, and my amazing husband is polite enough not to point out the insane amount of cookies/chocolate I have consumed in the last 2 days.  I only wish the scale would be so kind when all these sweets catch up to me.  I will say that last night was a pretty good night.  He still had 3 night terrors, but they only lasted 30-60 minutes and he was able to go back to sleep.  We ended up getting 3 good chunks of sleep.  Yay!!!!  We are really working on getting on a schedule right now to help him feel secure.  I have also been talking to alot of other adoptive parents to get ideas for how they have handled night terrors.  I am a list maker so it helps me to have a list of all the different things people have tried so that when I am at a complete loss of how to help him I have something that I can reference.  

On a good note Konnor is a great eater.  We have started expanding his foods since we got home and he is loving it!!!  He is mostly on baby foods thickened with rice/oatmeal cereal or soft foods.  He has to have things thickened to be able to swallow due to his cleft lip/palate, but that sure doesn't stop him from gobbling up every last bite of food.  We have also started getting more fluids in him.  He still won't take a bottle and can't work the sippy cups we bought, but he is drinking alot more that we are offering off the spoon.  I talked to the cleft team and last night we tried a new sippy cup with him.  He LOVED IT!!!  We made a total mess, but he was able to take 3 1/2 oz in a fraction of the time that I could have spoon fed it to him.  YAY!!!  

We are also working on getting him on a meal schedule that includes snacks in the hopes that we can put some weight on this baby.  We had our first appt with the Pediatrician Friday 5/25/12.  She said to keep doing what we are doing as far as feeding and pushing fluids.  We do need to put some work in on the fine motor skills like I talked about before, but overall he is really doing pretty well.  He was 16 lbs 5 oz and 28.5 inches long.  That makes him 1% for weight and 2% for height.   Poor little guy had to get 4 shots though.  I didn't cry, but it was close.  We  had to go back yesterday for lab work and that time I did cry.  They had to stick him 3 times.  It was nothing they did wrong, his little veins just would not give up enough blood for all the screenings he needed.  We have gotten back about half the labs though and so far everything looks good.  He is no longer anemic so that made me happy.  While we were waiting to get his labs done this elderly lady came up to us and asked if we had adopted to which of course we said yes.  She then said that she has supported Operations Smiles for years and that she thinks it is wonderful that he has found a family and that he is such a handsome boy that will be even more handsome once his lip is fixed.  She was teary eyed the whole time she was talking to us and you could tell she really meant well.  It was very sweet.  Konnor then got to make his 2nd trip to the Dr. yesterday b/c he woke up wheezing and his dry cough that he has had since we got him turned into a wet cough with green junk draining from his mouth.  He had been running a low grade temp all weekend which I had just attributed to his shots.  Verdict was possible bronchitis or possible ear infection.  He has very small ear canals so she can't see into them very well so we are just going to treat with a broad spectrum antibiotics to cover all the bases.  See a couple posts back where I thought he had an ear infection in China, but the Dr. at his medical appt told me his ears were clear--REALLY cause my Dr. can't even see in his ears very well so I think that guy was just brushing us off!  He will see the Cleft Palate team on Friday so we are working with the insurance to get that all squared away right now.  

Here are a few things we have learned in our first few days home: 

-we will never have enough stain remover

-laundry is tripling

-If there is something we don't want Konnor to have then it will be the object of his obsession

-dishes with a toddler in the house are never ending

-our grocery bill is going to double

-we can function on only 3 hours sleep

-when you are getting up at 430 am to start your day you really can get alot done by 9 am

-teamwork is a must in getting everything done around the house 

-you have to be able to admit when you have had enough and need a nap b/c your spouse is NOT a mind reader, but will support you in anyway possible

-our lives will never be the way they were before, but will only be better

-when you are sleep deprived and on your last functioning brain cell your Son's smile when he wakes up from a nap can make it all better

just to name a few.....

I'm an American Citizen!!!!!

Snuggling with Baba on our first night home.  He was tuckered out.

Best Buddies  : )

Consulate Day

Monday May 20, 2012

We met our guide at 0745 to go to the American Consulate in Guangzhou.  There were about 8 other families there also.  We were all there to apply for visa's for the children.  This was not at all what I was expecting.  There is really nothing exciting about it at all.  They herd everyone into this small sterile looking room with a row of glass windows.  There was an older girl of maybe 11-12 there that was being adopted and she just loved Konnor.  Apparently she was having a rough day, but once she started playing with Konnor her little face just lit up.  They have everyone stand up and swear all at the same time that all the information we have given is true and accurate.  Then they call everyone up one family at a time, you hand over the paperwork your guide helped you fill out, sign on the dotted line and then you are done.  They remind you to apply for the Social Security card when you get home, they remind you about keeping the citizenship form for the child (b/c it is like a birth certificate for the child) and they remind you that the child will be an American citizen once they clear customs at the first airport in the USA.  That's it.  Really?  I kinda thought there would be a little more to it than that.  No little flags for the kids.  Nothing.  I could have done this in my pj's.

Then we went to a book/music store where our guide helped us pick out some CD's that are in Cantonese.    Konnor is from southern China and is therefore considered Cantonese.  Cantonese is the native language for this area.  We also bought him a couple of puzzles for when he is a little bit older.  We headed back to the hotel for a lazy afternoon where all three of us took a 3 hour nap.  We actually ended up waking Konnor up after 3 1/2 hrs b/c he usually only sleep 1 1/2- 2hrs in the afternoon and we didn't want him to be up all night.  Let me just tell you how that backfired later.  We went to dinner at Pizza Hut with 2 other  adoptive families.  It is great to get out with some other families who know what you are going thru.  Both couples are wonderful.  We have been very blessed to meet some amazing people on this trip.  Oh and on a side note, the Pizza Hut here is SOOOOO much better than the Pizza Hut back home.  Don't ask me what the difference is, but I am trying to talk Mark into going back for dinner tonight.

Sleeping is starting to become an issue around here.  We woke Konnor up from that long nap and then he was totally out cold by 745.  He usually doesn't go to bed till between 8-930 (closer to 9 usually).  He sleeps (and I use that term loosely) the whole night, but he is very restless.  He will start fussing/whimpering in his sleep and he tosses/turns all night.  He isn't having night terrors which is a huge blessing, but I think he is starting to worry that we won't be there when he wakes up.  He will fuss and when he opens his eyes and sees us he starts smiling and then goes right back to sleep.  Sometime he will put his hand up for us to kiss and then go back to sleep.  It is like he is just making sure we are still real and there if he needs us.  I am happy that he is finding comfort in our presence, but the poor guy is exhausting himself.  Unfortunately he is doing this more times during the night than I can even count which is also exhausting MaMa and BaBa.

The next 2 days are going to be trying so keep your fingers crossed for us.  Right now it is Tuesday morning and Konnor is down for another unusually long nap.  This would be fine except I need to start packing and everything I need to pack is right by his crib.  Today at 430 our guide will be dropping off Konnor's passport and visa to us.  This is the last of the paperwork we need for him and then at around 7 pm we board a bus for Hong Kong.  We are staying the night in a hotel and then tomorrow morning we board a plane for the 15 hour flight home.

So this is our last day full day in China.  It is definitely bittersweet.  We are all tired and can't wait to get Konnor home so we can start living our normal life as a family.  We are a little sad though b/c this is Konnor's last day in China. We hope to bring him back for a heritage tour someday, and who knows where his life will lead him, but for the foreseeable future this is the last time Konnor will be in China.  He has spent the first year of his life here, and even though we may complain about this or that, China really is a beautiful country with an amazing history.  For now we will just try to teach Konnor about all we have learned and hopeful he will grow to appreciate the country of his birth.  He has already come so far in the week he has been with us and we can't wait to see how well he will do once he is in a stable environment.

So for now this is us signing off.  Goodbye China.  Maybe we will see you again someday, but even if we don't we will always be grateful for this little angel that is now the center of our lives.

Last dose of cuteness from China.  The next post won't be for a couple days, but it will be from home sweet home!!

Next stop......Home!!!!

Safari Park

Sunday May 20, 2012

Today the only thing on the agenda was to go to the Safari Park.  It is a big zoo, but the difference is that the animals are very close.  There are just small barriers seperating some of the animals and others there are no barriers at all.  You can feed the giraffes and feed the baby animals (tigers and bears, etc..).  Almost everyone that I have talked to said it was a great experience.  Let's just say that for us it was Not.  We started the day by deciding the BaBa needed to stay at the hotel b/c he is sick.  It is just sinus and allergy junk, but all the drainage is giving him a sore throat and keeping him up at night.  So it was decided that Mark would stay at the hotel and rest while Konnor and I ventured to the Safari Park alone.  This being the first time venturing out for any length of time with Konnor by myself.  Be Brave Ashley, just Be Brave!!!!  It wouldn't be a big deal if I wasn't in a foreign country where I don't speak the language, I don't have my own transportation and people like to just walk up and touch my child.

It started out okay.  The guide picked us up and took us to pick up the other family that had gone to the medical exam with us yesterday.  Have I mentioned that Konnor doesn't really care to sit for long periods of time?  I do not foresee him liking his carseat at all!!!   He prefers to be moving around and sitting in a car for a 40 minute drive is not his idea of fun.  He did pretty well, b/c the other little girl was very happy and they were entertaining eachother for awhile.  After we paid and entered is when I realized that the guide was going to just leave us to do our own thing and come back in like 4 1/2 hours.  WHAT?!?  Normally this would be preferred for me, but every other thing we have done this whole trip has been guided so I was not prepared for this.    It was already like 90 degrees with 100% humidity in the shade.  I don't know what the actual temp was, but to say it was hot is a complete understatement.  Every person I saw was dripping.  Ok, it will be fine.  It was decided that we would just stick with the other family.  The first thing we did was take the train that circles the park.  This really is great, but they put Konnor and I in a different section than the other family which means that we basically turned into the side show.  It did go much better than I expected and nobody tried to touch him so that was good.  Konnor fussed for a little bit and then finally drifted off to sleep and I was able to take a couple pictures.  We then embarked on the walking portion of the park.  I did get Konnor laid down in his stroller for a short 20 min nap.  It was going well until some lady came up and touched his head b/c she wanted me to straighten him out in his stroller.  So then we were up from our all to short nap.  At least she was trying to do a nice thing and was not touching his cleft.  This was Konnor's first real experience with sitting in his stroller and it did not go well.  Let's just say that I had to carry him the entire time while pushing the stroller and feeding him puffs.  I am working on growing my 3rd arm as we speak.  I will say that had Konnor been older this would have been an awesome place to go.  I would never recommend it with a one year old in the scorching heat.  Konnor is a very laid back kid, but enough was enough.  We were both drenched in sweat, hungry, tired and getting eaten alive by bugs.  This is where my Mother taught me if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all, so I am just going to skip ahead to leaving the park.    We did end up calling the guide to pick us up an hour early.  At this point Konnor was well past lunch time and nap time and screamed bloody murder the entire 40 minute drive back.  We promptly got clean/dry clothes (after a quick hose down), ate and went down for nap.

Our guide came back over later and we finished filling out all the paperwork for Konnor's Visa.  The rest of the night was pretty uneventful.  Just bath and playing.  Konnor has started sleeping till between 12-2 am and then waking up and laying in bed with us the rest of the night.  He is still pretty restless, but he seems to like seeing us as soon as he wakes up b/c he starts smiling right away like he wasn't sure we would still be there.  This kid is so great I can't even begin to tell you.  Here is a brief peek at our adventure at the Safari Park.

This was one of the few smiley faces I got while at the park. 

Short nap time (first nap in a stroller)

Yes we were this close!!!

Medical Exam

Saturday May 19, 2012

Our guide picked us up at 0830 to head over for Konnor's medical exam.  We stopped on the way and picked up another family that is adopting a little girl and using the same agency.  The little girl is absolutely darling, but as soon as she saw me she started screaming.  Poor thing.  We headed over to get the exam's and let me tell you this is like running a marathon.  The first thing you do is go into this little room where the child HAS to sit on a stool facing forward to get a picture taken.  Konnor had fallen asleep on the way over and let me just say that he was not a fan of them waking him up to take a  picture.  Did I mention that he also hates the flash?  You get about one picture with a flash and then you have to turn it off or you get a meltdown.  That is why some of my pictures look so dark.  Anyway they took like 5 pictures with a flash.  We went into the lobby and then had to turn around and go back in again b/c the pictures didn't turn out.  WHAT!!  Seriously you photograph these children all day don't you have this down to an artform.  Oh well, we managed to get it and the final product was a pretty stinkin cute picture. Next we got in line for the medical exams.  The first room the woman listened to his heart and lungs, laid him down and palpated his belly and gave him a once over looksey and that was it.  Ok not to bad.  He did pretty well.  Next we went for measurements.  The woman just reached over and grabbed him away to put him on the scale.  My initial reaction was to grab him back, but I knew it needed to be done.  They checked height and weight (about 16.5 lbs), figured out that he is ticklish and handed him back.  I was so excited when he reached for me.  Then we went into a little room for the ENT exam.  Konnor sat on my lap, the guy squeeked a toy on each side a couple times to make sure Konnor was hearing and responding on each side, did a quick lookey loo in his nose/mouth and ears and blessed him to move on.  I had been worried about a possible ear infection b/c he was pulling at his ears alot, but he said they are clear and so I am thinking this is maybe just an I am starting to get tired thing.  I swear it took me longer to type this all out then the actual exam took.  They herd you from room to room and there are dozens of other families all waiting to do the same thing in the lobby.  It was nuts.

We just hung out in the room for the next couple hours until the loud people upstairs woke him up from his nap.  I swear they must have been building the ark up there with all the banging that was going on.  We ended up meeting another family for dinner.  This is the family that we had met in Chicago that was on the same flight to Hong Kong as us.  They are great and their little girl is adorable.  We went to a Mexican restraunt that was actually pretty good.  Konnor did amazingly well and didn't "check out" the entire time we were out and about.  He even shared his toys pretty well when they stopped by to drop off some snackies for Konnor that their daughter didn't want.

Next was bed.  We have found that despite that fact that our instinct is to rock him to sleep, Konnor actually prefers it if we just lay with him on the bed and he can snuggle us until he falls asleep on his own.  Occasionally he will let us rock him, but it is usually a struggle.  I think he was used to putting himself to sleep at the orphanage.  We want him to go to sleep knowing we are there and that he is safe and protected so just letting him fall asleep in the crib is not an option.  We all seem to have compromised pretty well with lets just all lay on the bed together until Konnor falls asleep and then we transfer him to the crib.  The first few nights he was sleeping thru the night, but the last 3 he is waking up around 2-230 and coming to lay in bed with us the rest of the night.  He has been really restless the last few nights so I don't know if it is his teeth bothering him or just him adjusting to his new situation.  On a tooth note he still has 2 teeth, there is another one working it's way up on the bottom that I can see, but it just doesn't want to break thru.  I figure it will probably make an appearance on the 15 hour flight home : )

Developmentally this child never ceases to amaze me.  He is very aware of his surroundings and knows exactly what he is doing.  We have a basket in the room that he has his toys in.  His favorite toy is the stacking cups we brought (seriously the best $1 I ever spent at the Dollar Store).  He will put them in the basket and then take them out.  When he is playing with then he knows exactly which one he wants and if you try to hand him one that he didn't want he will just go around you to get the one he wants.   In the last 2 days he has learned how to go from a standing position to a sitting position all by himself.  He has an onery streak.  He has started hearing "No" in the last few days b/c he figured out where the outlets are in the room and now thinks it is a game to try get around us.  And he doesn't forget either.  Just b/c he has moved on to play with something else does not mean that he has forgotten about them.  He is just waiting until you think he has forgotten about them : )

Konnor taking everything out of the basket

MaMa and Konnor

The Hendricks Family out to dinner

Shopping Day!!

Friday May 18, 2012

Konnor is officially 13 months old today.  Yay!!!  It is pretty much the consensus of everyone we meet that he is just absolutely adorable.  I am totally biased of course, but I have to say that I agree 1000%.

Today our guide picked us up to take us to do some shopping.  We were armed with our list of things that we really wanted to try to get.  The first stop was the pearl shop.  These ladies were great and I was able to get a belated Mother's Day present for me from Mark (pearls are Konnor's birth stone : ) and we also picked up a necklace and earrings for Konnor to give his future wife or daughter.  We wanted him to have something to pass on that was from the province he is from and that we had gotten at the time he came home.  They are beautiful and I couldn't even get fake pearls this cheap back home.  Jackpot!!!!  The rest of our shopping adventure was cut off b/c it was pouring down rain with no signs of stopping.  WE are supposed to go do a little more shopping after Konnor's physical tomorrow.

I had my first person come up and touch Konnor today.  I did NOT care for this.  I dealt with it ok though and our guide was there and talked the lady away.  I have found that people are much more likely to approach me when I am by myself than when Mark is standing close by.  Now we just try to keep within a few feet of eachother so he can deter anyone that makes me uncomfortable.  Have I mentioned that I have the worlds greatest Husband?!?  He has been so wonderful with Konnor and very patient with me and all my craziness since we have been here.  I am sure that he can't wait until we get home and can get back to something that resembles normalcy.

Really that is all for today so I thought I would take this opportunity to make note of some of a few things we have learned about our new son in the last 5 days.
-when he is very tired the finger goes in the mouth and he gets VERY chatty.  He started saying something like "aiya aiya aiya" over and over until he falls asleep (that is when he isn't screaming b/c he is overtired).

-he is very ticklish!!!

-he has a smile that can light up a room and a giggle to match

-he is fascinated by watching himself in the mirror

-he loves anything that makes noise

-he can crawl like a mad man

-he loves to walk while holding onto fingers

-he loves water and really doesn't mind the bath part of it at all

Just to name a few.  Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Snuggles with BaBa

There is a new Cardinals fan in the house!!!!

Day 4 with Konnor

Thursday May 17, 2012

Today was a pretty low key day.  It has been so beneficial to us that Konnor was from Guangdong Province.  This means that we have been able to be in Guangzhou the entire time we have him until we go home.  I think this has been so helpful to him, b/c it means that we have had the same environment and alot of down time while here.  We have been able to spend lots of time snuggling and basically just doing whatever he needs to do b/c we haven't had the busy schedule that sometimes accompanies being in another province before traveling to Guangzhou.

Today we went to a local museum with our guide.  It was very interesting to learn about the Han Dynasty that was only around from BC 203 - BC 111.  We were able to walk thru the actual excavation site where they found the Emperor.  After this we went back to the hotel b/c little man was ready for lunch and a  nap.  Needless to say the nap didn't happen : )

About 230 Konnor had his first ever visitors when the Cole Family came to visit.  They are actually from my home town, and when I noticed on Facebook that they were living in Guangzhou I had to get in touch to see about getting together.  It is crazy to think how the people you know may touch your lives in the craziest ways in the future.  Konnor made fast friends with their daughter Alivia.  We headed out for pizza and then Konnor decided that he was tired, but entirely to interested in the new people to take a nap.  I have already adapted to the whole my food will never be eaten warm again thing : )  It was great to see everyone and we really appreciated getting out of the hotel for a little bit with someone other than our guide for conversation.

Afterwards we headed back to the hotel where we were able to get Konnor to take a short 30 minute nap. Unfortunately after 30 minutes he started screaming bloody murder.  We suspicion he was having a night terror (his first) and it was absolutely the most awful thing I have ever experienced.  He was still asleep, but would just scream and arch with huge tears streaming down his cheeks.  It took us a good 45 minutes to get him calmed down.  The whole time I am crying too b/c there is just nothing you can do to help when this happens.  We just held him and talked to him until he finally woke up.  We know night terrors are a common thing when children have their lives disrupted, but my goodness they are terrifying.  And if that wasn't a night terror then Heaven help us when he does have one b/c our hearts were breaking into a million pieces watching him so upset.

After that though he was back to his normal happy self.  Actually Mark and I have noticed that since that happened he has been reaching for us more and actively seeking us out.  He is crawling to us when he wants us (not that we are ever really that far away, but it is nice that he wants to come to us).  He is now giving us more full fledged reaches when he wants to be picked up.  He learned today that he can stand up all by himself while holding on to our fingers or the table.  He is also doing better at taking in some water by spoon.  Still not great and I wish he would take a bottle, but we are putting lots of fluids in his meals.  He zonked out around 9 pm and fearing the worst, b/c of his naptime experience, we headed to bed shortly after that.  He woke up twice during the night, but only for a short time and went right back to sleep. He slept until 7 am!!!!!  We were so excited.  The nannies had said that he usually sleeps from 930 pm to 630 am, so hopefully this means he is trying to get back on his normal schedule.  Although they also said that he only takes one nap a day from 12-2 pm and that is proving to not be the case.  I think maybe he took a few naps on his own.  Usually he will sleep for 30-45 minutes in the morning sometime and then again 30-60 minutes in the evening.  Whatever he needs.  We are not really concerned with a schedule right now so it doesn't really matter.  We are still trying to stick close to the hotel with small outings so that we are available to just do whatever he needs.  He did great when we went out for dinner today and never "checked out."

Konnor did hear "No" for the first time today from MaMa and BaBa.  We were trying to charge the computer and he kept going back to the cord.  He had also gotten comfortable enough that instead of lying there perfectly nice and still for diapers changes like he did the first two days, he has now decided that diaper changes are now time to see how flexible MaMa and BaBa are.  He just laughs the whole time, but we are quickly learning how to change the diaper of a toddler that is crawling away from us.

Ok this gets me caught up to today.  Here is another dose of Konnor cuteness to get you thru your work day!!!

Mark took this one and I love it!!!  Yes ladies he has eyelashes that most of us spend hundreds of dollars a year on mascara to even come close to.  

Happy Baby--we are seeing more and more smiles freely given

Amazing!!!!

Wednesday May 16, 2012

We got another good 7 1/2 hour sleep last night.  I just can't even tell you how incredibly it is to be with him finally.  He is eating rice cereal mixed with formula very well.  We have also mixed peas with rice cereal and he really likes this.  Today we started some bannana both by itself and mixed in with cereal and he loves it.  Of course he is still a big fan of the puffs when we are in a jam and the food isn't ready yet.  We are trying to keep his food very simple for now.  Basically we are feeding him like we would a 5 month old that is just starting out on foods.  We are trying to only introduce a new food every couple days to see what he likes and tolerates.  He is excellent at clearing his palate and knows that he has to tip his head back when he swallows.  I tell you this kid is amazing.  Frankly if it wasn't for Mark and I making such a mess he would never miss a drop.  As of right now it takes anywhere from 30-60 minutes for each feeding.  I think part of that though is that we are still trying to figure out how much he will take so sometimes there is a pause to get more (he will let you know about this too b/c he want's his food : ).  We are getting better at figuring out his little things that tell us when he is hungry or done eating or tired.  This morning we found ANOTHER TOOTH!!!  Yes he now has one on top, one on the bottom and I think another working it's way up on the bottom.  He still absolutely refuses a bottle.  The only time he has taken one was the first night and the next morning (and he only took a couple oz) and I think that was just b/c he was so tired he couldn't fight it.  We have tried every configuration of bottle we have, hot, cold, mixed with cereal, etc.... and he will not take it.  I suspicion that he only ever took a bottle at the orphanage when they were to busy to stop and feed him.  You can see on his lip where it looks like he used to bang the bottle up against his lip b/c there is a little indentation there on his cleft and it was very scabed over.  Since he has gone a few days without a bottle this area has healed up beautifully.  I also think that part of the no taking the bottle is that it probably hurt when he was taking it while it would hit his lip and now he knows that he doesn't have to do that anymore.  We are making sure he gets alot of formula mixed with his cereal and counting his diapers (yes obsessive Nurse MaMa here!) to make sure he isn't getting dehydrated.  Today we figured out that he will let you spoon feed him a little bit of water or formula.  He doesn't take alot this way, but any extra fluids is a good thing at this point.  I am going to try to call the Cleft team back home tonight and see if they have any other recommendations for taking a bottle.

We went to the police station today and took his picture for his passport.  He did so good there.  We also received our Adoption Decree while we were there.  I tell you this is the most beautiful document I have ever seen b/c it means that he is legally ours now!!!!!  Once he touches US soil he will officially become an American Citizen.  I can't believe it.  I just want to cry everytime I look at the document.  There were several other families there with their guides as well.  It was nice getting to talk to some of the people.

 Also Richard told us that the guides were talking and they all agreed that Konnor is doing amazingly well.  They all said that most children coming from the orphanage at his age don't have nearly the motor skills that he does.  He will let either Mark or I hold him with no fuss.  He has not reached for anyone else up to this point (I think maybe it helps that we have a male guide so he doesn't see him as much as a caretaker).   Today he started actively looking for us when we leave the room.  If one of us is holding him he is watching where the other one is going to make sure they don't get to far away.  He has reached for us both a couple times.  The reaches are still a little tenative like he still isn't sure if it is okay or not, but it is definitely a start.  Biggest milestone of the day is we had our first POOP!!!  And not just one, but 3 poops!!!!!  I know those that are not in the adoption community are probably wondering why this is such a big deal, but it is Huge!  The easy answer is this (and truthfully it applies to any child, not just adopted children):  when children have major life changes that disrupt their normal routine and feeling of safety they often become constipated.  This is largely b/c a small child has very little to no control over what is happening to them, but the one thing they do have control over is their bodily functions.  So when an adopted child has their first poop with their new parents this is huge b/c it means that they are becoming comfortable with their new family and situation.  The fact that this happened when he has been with us less than 48 hours is a very good indicator of how comfortable he is with us.  At this point we are just celebrating every little milestone.

We did venture out for lunch today.  We are trying to get him out a couple times a day for short periods to start letting him become accostomed to more people, noises and sounds.  We went to a Chinese restaraunt down the street that has the most amazing barbequed pork fried rice.  I took his lunch of peas and rice and he ate while we waited on our food.  He did really well for about 20 minutes before he decided that he had had enough so we packed it up and headed back to the hotel where he a Mama got an awesome and much needed 1 1/2 hr nap : )  We also ventured to the hotel pool for a little bit last night.  We only stayed about 15 minutes, just long enough for him to get the experience and then left.  Oh my this boy loves water!!!  Loves the pool and loves bathtime.  He just splashes and splashes.

Ok so here is where I talk about how I am struggling with being here.  We were forewarned more times than you can count about the fact that the people here would stare and possibly even try to touch Konnor.  They see children with deformities as unlucky and often wonder why we would want "that baby."  In all honesty we haven't had anyone come up to us and try to touch him, which is really good b/c I just don't think I would tolerate that well since I have my own personal space issues.  I am completely fine with people who look and even the people who do a double take don't bother me.  We just keep on walking and I ignore them.  Thankfully Konnor is young enough that he doesn't understand why everyone is staring at him, but it breaks my heart that there are all these older children who do know and understand why people are staring.  We actually had one lady crane her neck to try to get a peak at him while he slept in my arms and when she saw him she gasped, threw her hands over her face and started shaking her head.  The Mama tiger in me just wants to say "he is beautiful, but you are just ugly and mean spirited and there is nothing you can do to change that you evil hag!"  I really am not a mean person, but come on, seriously!!!  If you had kept your busy body nose to yourself you would never have seen him.  I had another guy in the lobby while I was waiting on Mark try to take a picture of him with his cell phone.  I just kept turning every which direction until Mark finally showed up and we walked away (yep I can keep this up all day buddy so just go away b/c you are not taking a picture of my baby for any purpose other than b/c he is so stinkin cute).  I understand that it is a cultural thing.  I know the reasons behind the stares, but it still breaks my heart that these people can't look past his lip to see the amazing smile and beautiful little soul that makes up who he is.  This is one of the times that I really wish that we didn't have our own personal guide and that we were here with a group.  At least then there is a little bit of a buffer.  Truthfully other than for our appointments and venturing out for lunch we haven't really left the hotel.  This has been good for Konnor b/c he is really getting one on one time with MaMa and BaBa, but what it means is that when we do venture out MaMa gets very emotional b/c she wants to smack some of these people.  I will give a huge thumbs up to the Garden Hotel staff.  Noone here has given him any weird looks and truthfully most of them will smile at him and try to make him laugh.  We have also noticed that it seems to be the middle to lower class that have the most problem.  Alot of the people that we have run into in the hotel (keep in mind it is a 5 star hotel so alot of these people are the 3 piece suit type) do a double take, but then they start talking to him and smile at us.  Sorry I just needed to vent a little bit and get it out.  Keeping it all bottled up was making me a little emotional and poor Mark just doesn't know what to do when Konnor and I are both crying : )

Ok I am done with my vent now.  I just can't wait to get Konnor home so that he will be surrounded by all the people that will love him for exactly who he is just like his Mama and Baba do.  You are all going to be so amazed by him.  I don't know what we ever did to deserve such an amazing little boy, but we are so thankful to have been blessed enough to be his parents.

Ashley

Here is today's dose of cuteness!!!!!

Love Love Love that smile!!!

I'm tired MaMa

Adoption Day!!!!

Tuesday May 15, 2012

I couldn't believe Konnor slept 7 1/2 hours his first night.  We were ecstatic.  Mark and I are starting to get the hang of taking turns so the other can eat (granted the food is still cold, but it is food) and while one feeds him or plays then the other will go wash bottles, bibs and food containers.  Konnor loves Bannana puffs.  These things are a lifesaver!!!  We left for the Civil Affairs office around 9 to go sign the final paperwork to finalize our adoption.  Wowzer that was a long two hours.  Konnor took a 20 minute nap on the way there, but otherwise pretty much screamed bloody murder the rest of the time.  Poor guy.  He wouldn't take a bottle and just couldn't get comfortable for more than a few minutes at a time.  The other families that were there finishing paperwork too were giving us the very pathetic "been there done that but glad it isn't me this time" looks.

Mark and Richard dropped Konnor and I off at the hotel for a nap while Mark went to the store in search of a few essentials.  I finally got Konnor to take a 1 hr 20 min nap on my chest .  I treasured the moment, but the whole time was praying "please get all your sleep out little guy."  Up to this point we were pretty much attributing how fussy he was to his lack of sleep and having his little world turned upside down.  I don't know how to describe it, but it just didn't seem like "adoption" behavior to me, it seemed like "something is wrong and why can't you figure it out" behavior.  He was ok for a while after his nap and ate peas mixed with rice cereal for lunch.  He still threw a complete fit when you tried to give him a bottle.  We got him to take a few oz the first night and a few oz in the early am, but otherwise he is completely refusing bottles.  He had a really rough afternoon.  He would just arch and cry then be ok for a few minutes then start all over.  Around 5 we were finishing his evening cereal mix and he leaned forward and started chewing on the stroller (we are feeding him in this b/c it is so much easier than one of us trying to hold him while he eats).  When he started this lightening struck and I remembered that as of our last update this little guy has no teeth.  We checked and sure enough he has a brand new tooth on the bottom and it looked like another one working it's way up next to it.  Hallelujah!!!!  Now that I know what the problem is I can help the poor guy.  Orajel and Tylenol to the rescue and he is back to his happy little self in a half hour.

We have noticed that Konnor is having some problems with overstimulation.  It is one of the things they warn you about in all the books and classes you have to take so thankfully we are being really observant and noticed it right away.  We tried to go to dinner last night with some other adoptive families at a restaurant across the street.  We didn't know they have a live band and it was SO LOUD!!!  He lasted about 5 minutes before we noticed that he had what we call "checked out."  We have noticed that when he gets overloaded he gets this blank stare in his eyes and wants to sit facing you so he can hide in your chest. Normally he wants to be held so that he can look out b/c he is so nosey.  He also gets very quiet when he is like this.  We said our regrets as soon as we noticed this behavior and headed back to the hotel where we had McDonald's for the 3rd night in a row b/c it was easy and fast so he could get back in his normal environment.   We are trying to get him out just 1-2 times a day for a little bit so that he can start getting used to the sights and sounds, otherwise we are keeping pretty close to the hotel room.  The nannies had said that before Monday he had never left the orphanage so everything is new to him and probably more than a little scary.  When he is in the room with us he is so happy and outgoing.  As soon as we got back last night he was completely back to his normal self.  We went out for lunch today and he was good for about 20 minutes before he started getting the blank stare again.  He seems to do really well in small groups though, like the last 2 days when we have gone places to fill out paperwork and there have been other adoptive families in the room with us,  he does fine.  Truthfully as long as it is a small group in a confined space he dose great and even the other adoptive parents are marveling at how well he is doing.  We are just taking it one day at a time and trying to make sure that the decisions we make are what is best for him.  We may not get alot of sightseeing done, but as long as he is comfortable and happy that is what's important.  

Here is a photo from adoption day when we signed the final papers to make Konnor part of our forever family.  This is one of the few pictures we took today b/c anytime he saw the flash he started to melt down again.  He just looks so handsome : )

Gotcha Day Part 2

Monday May 14, 2012 continued....

Sorry it took so long to get the post up.  It takes about 5 minutes to upload each picture and that just wasn't time I had the last 2 days.  More on that later though.  Ok, so we left off with me having to do a double take b/c I recognized Konnor but was initially shocked by how small he was compared to his photos.  I immediately dropped my stuff and got down on his level and the nanny walked him over to me.  About that time our guide recommended we go over to some couches.  I sat down to get on his level while Mark pulled out the camera's.  I know it sounds crazy, but we kinda thought we would have at least a minutes warning before poof here he is!  The nanny walked Konnor over to me (it had been decided that I should hold him first b/c I will be home with him for a couple months and be the primary caregiver).  I was itching to grab him, but I knew I should give him a couple minutes to get his bearings so I was trying to just sit there and talk to him.  The nanny had other ideas though b/c after about 45 seconds she just handed him to me.  I couldn't believe we finally had him. I held him for about a minute when our guide snagged Mark and the nannies to go finish some paperwork.  They left Konnor and I alone for about 15 minutes of snuggle time.  He only cried for a few seconds on and off.  It didn't take me long to figure out that this little guy is inquisitive (that's a nice way to say nosey : )  It worked to our advantage that there were several other families there having their Gotcha Day b/c I think it took his mind off what was happening.  Finally everyone came back and BaBa (Daddy in Chinese)  got to hold him for the first time. There is no greater feeling in the world than getting to watch the man you love hold your Son for the first time.

While Konnor and BaBa had snuggle time our guide Richard asked our Gotcha Day questions: he eats congee (a type of rice porridge) twice daily and formula with rice cereal twice daily, he has had no major illness recently but did have a little cold last week, they gave us his daily schedule and Richard translated it for us, he likes to be held--ALOT, he has recently started showing some stranger anxiety, he walks by holding on to someones fingers, likes to play outside and with other children, they have a special name they call him but Richard said it is in their local dialect and even he can't really pronounce it, he is very healthy and rarely sick and overall he is a very happy baby.  The nanny's were awesome at showing us how he likes to be rocked and giving us alot of details.  They brought us the photo album and camera that we had sent him and they also brought us a little album that has a picture of the front of the orphanage and 5 new pictures of Konnor.  I kept every single piece of paper (including his name tag) from Gotcha Day.  I recorded all the question and answer session so we can go back and review it when we have questions b/c I know we won't remember it all.  Richard said that Konnor's orphanage Leizhou SWI has approx. 40-50 children, but this is only the 4th adoption they have done this year.  The nannies said that alot of their children are on the list waiting for families, but that a majority of their children have pretty significant special needs and so noone is willing to adopt them.  They said that Konnor is actually one of their healthiest children.  Richard said that the area and orphanage Konnor is from is very poor.  There is very little industry in the area, which is good in a way b/c that means there is less polution there, but it is bad b/c it makes the local economy so bad.  They do alot of fishing in the area b/c they are near the sea.

At this point we all got together so we could take pictures with the nannies.  I had to do a little giggle b/c even the nannies wanted individual pictures with me.  They told Richard that they thought I was very pretty and could they get pictures. Well DUH!!  I would take pictures anyway, but these are the ladies that have taken care of my Son for the first year of his life so I will pretty much do whatever they want!!!  They really were very sweet though and you could tell that they were very happy Konnor was getting a forever family.  At this point we headed to the car.  Poor Konnor had a 7 hour drive from Leizhou so he was pretty tuckered out.  His nannies said that this is the first time he has ever been away from the orphanage.  I swear he is one calm little dude.  He just looks around and takes it all in when other children would be totally freaked out by all the noise and people. He finally caved on the way back to the hotel and fell asleep sitting up.  We went up to the room and Mark filled out some paperwork while I snuggled with the little man.  Then we did the trade off and I filled in all my sections while BaBa had snuggles.  Our guide kept saying how surprised he was at how healthy he looked.  He said most children coming from the orphanage don't look as good as Konnor.  I thought is was great b/c Richard said he has been doing this since 1997 so he has been around the block a few times and I figure he has a pretty good idea of what to expect.  For the last day he had been reminding us of all the worst case scenarios' that we could encounter with Konnor to try and prepare us.

Richard eventually left and Konnor woke up from his short nap.  Oh my gosh he is such a good baby.  We spent the rest of the night playing, snuggling and trying to figure out the best way to feed him.  As the nannies told us he loves anything that makes noise.  He is all boy : )  Travel Tip:  stacking cups are $1 at the dollar stores and are the most amazing toys.  He absolutely loves them!!!  He is also pretty fascinated with the travel size thing of wipes b/c he likes to crinkle the wrapper.  Noise--anything that makes noise : )  We were able to get some rice cereal mixed with formula and 3 oz of formula down him before bed.  He does a really good job of clearing his palate and hardly loses a drop of food.  He knows to tip his head back when he swallows and he was so patient with us as we figured out how he liked to eat.  We found out that he also LOVES his bath.  He splashed and splashed and had a grand old time.  Overall he looks pretty healthy, but is very tiny.  Thank goodness another recently home adoptive MaMa talked to me about diapers before we left and I brought size 2 diapers with me b/c even those we have to wrap pretty tight on him. And THANK YOU so much to the ladies at work who recently brought me in some 3-9 month clothes after we got our last update.  I am definitely using them.  He does pretty good on the length of things, but he has this itty bitty little waist that just swims in 6-9 month shorts. He ended up going to bed at 9 and I couldn't believe it but he slept until 430!!!!  What?!?!  I was totally expecting him to be up every half hour.  According to his schedule he usually goes to bed at 930 and sleeps till 630, but man 7 1/2 hours our first night.  I was ecstatic.  Now granted I didn't sleep that long.  He is a VERY noisy sleeper.  Partially b/c his cleft is so bad that he has no closure so you hear every breath like an echo.  This new MaMa was up about every 30-45 minutes.   Everytime he rolled over or coughed etc.  I would wake up thinking he needed something.

Overall Gotcha Day couldn't have gone any better.  I never in a million years expected him to do so well.  He is letting both Mark and I hold him which is definitely a huge thing.  I can't believe how blessed we are to have this little guy with us.  I will stop here and post about today later b/c we were finally able to get a thingamajig to download pictures and I know that is really what you all want to see : )  So enjoy.  Oh as you will see in an upcoming picture.  He has the greatest smile.  I was so excited the first time I saw it b/c we was not smiling in any of our pictures we had of him.

Konnor walking to MaMa and BaBa

BaBa holding Konnor for the first time. 

MaMa holding Konnor for the first time

This smile is worth more than the rarest gem.  His giggle is just as great!!!

We have him!!!!!

Monday May 14, 2012

It has been 3 years 10 months and 10 days since we made the decision to become parents.  To say that the road has been rocky at times would be an understatement, but we have persevered and I am so completely over the moon ecstatic to be able to tell everyone that today at 240 pm (140 am Illinois time) we held our Son for the first time.  That's right folks we now have Konnor with us!!!!!!!  I will freely admit that the last 1 1/2 hr before we got him I was a nervous wreck.  Our guide picked us up at 2 pm and drove us to the Adoption Registry Center of Guangdong Province. When we walked in there was already about 6 other families on the couches  having their Gotcha Day as well.  Most of the children seemed to just be in shock. After a few minutes of waiting Richard motioned us over.  It seemed like he was getting ready to take us somewhere so we grabbed our stuff and walked the couple feet to him.  Out of the corner of my eye I saw a movement and looked to see a woman helping a child walk by holding his hands.  I had to do a double take before I realized it was Konnor she was walking towards us.  It seriously took me a minute to recognize him b/c he is sooooooo small.  I know he looks big in his pictures, but he is a tiny little guy.   I am going to leave this right here b/c we have a very tired little boy on our hands.  I will finish telling everyone about Gotcha Day when we get the chance, but for now KONNOR IS WITH US!!!!

Ashley

Beijing Day 4

Sorry for the delay, but we were just way to tired to get this blog done yesterday.  We started the day bright and early and left the hotel at 0730.  We headed straight to the Great Wall of China.  The section that we went to is called the Mutianyu Great Wall and was about 1 hr 15 min outside the city.  Our guide said she thinks it is one of the most beautiful sections.

They started construction on the Great Wall during the 7th century B.C.  It started out as individual walls that different provinces were constructing to protect themselves.  Eventually when all the provinces came under one ruler they started the process to connect the walls.  There was approx. 1 million people involved in the construction of the Great Wall (approx. 1/5 of China's population at the time).  They say that the Great Wall is the longest cemetary in the world b/c as workers would die they would bury their remains in the wall.  The entire Great Wall is over 5,000 km. The section we visited has 22 watch towers, with 14 still being open to the public.  I

t was really amazing to see.  We took the cable car to an upper section, which was a cool experience until we realized that our poor guide had a look of terror on her face.  We asked if she was afraid of heights and at first she said no, and then she said, "well maybe a little."  Based on the look of her face I would say maybe alot!  She was a trooper though and took a picture of us ascending.  They don't tell you that you have to walk the great wall until you can walk the Great Wall.  There are inclines going up everywhere until you actually get to the entrance.  Truthfully I was shocked, b/c I was one of those naive people who kinda thought it was all steps.  Actually it is compromised of steps and steep inclines, with watchtowers sporadically placed.  The watchtowers are great.  You can really envision where they had their fires for heat and food, where they would have slept and where they would have taken watch to keep an eye out for enemies.  It was VERY foggy while we were there.  You could only see probably 200 feet past the wall b/c the fog was so thick.  This also ended up making it very cold.  I think we walked for almost an hour before we decided it was time to turn around b/c we still had to walk all the way back.  On the way down we stopped and did our first haggling of the trip to buy some Great Wall sweatshirts.  Overall it really was an incredible experience.  To think of how long it has been there, the things that have happened around it and how many people have actually walked on it is just amazing.

Oh and for those of you that were taking bets (and don't even try to say you were not placing bets on this) it took me under 5 minutes to fall and scrap my knee on the Great Wall of China.  In my defense I was trying to get out of the way of a photo op b/c this Grandma looked like she was gonna come unglued if one more person walked in front of her picture.  I stepped back and tripped over a small incline.  I think i did a very graceful job of then crossing my legs and sitting there like nothing had happened : )  Ok, now whoever won, the rest of you pay up.

We stopped not far from the Great Wall and had Chinese food again.  We decided on sweet and sour chicken and chestnut chicken.  It was awesome.  I was able to eat the entire meal with  my chopsticks.  Mark gave it a valiant effort, but after about 5 minutes he decided that if we were ever going to get to the airport he needed a fork.

On the way to the airport our guide showed me how to draw some Chinese characters and reviewed the words that she had taught us.  She was really great.  Overall it was great to see Beijing, but I think we could have shortened our trip a day and it would have been fine with us.  It was nice to have our own personal guide, but Mark and I are the type of people that would do better with a small group.  Someone to basically just take us places and give us the history and then cut us loose to explore.  Don't get me wrong our guide was amazing, but I think she thought we were bored when really we were just trying to soak it all in.  She did comment though that she was impressed with how many questions we asked.  She said that it was good since we are adopting a baby from China that we are trying to learn as much as we can.

We were at the airport early so we just sat and read/watched a movie.  We actually boarded on time, but then had to sit on the plane for over an hour before take off b/c of rain and fog.  Mark and I agree that this was the worst flight we have ever been on.  It was very turbulent.  The pilots I swear would just go straight up instead of the gradual incline on most trips.  The food was awful and cold and the attendants pretty much ignored us.  Then we started our descent into Guangzhou and then suddenly pulled up again.  I can't even tell you how many times we circled the city.  I think I stopped counting after 4-5.  There was no announcement telling us what was going on and it was 45 minutes after we started our initial descent before we actually landed.  I think I said a continuous prayer thru that whole flight.  It was just crazy.  We did however land safely and all our luggage arrived without further delay.

Our guide Richard met us at the airport and took us straight to the Garden Hotel to check in.  He even took us up to our room to make sure everything was alright.  There was a little basket waiting for us with some baby lotion/soap/powder, a wash mitt and a little panda bear in a Chinese outfit.  I thought that was so sweet.  Konnor's crib was also already in the room and ready to go.  I started to unpack while Richard took Mark to get us some grub.  This late at night with as tired as we were it had to be basic McDonalds, and it was Good!!  Seriously though our hotel is crazy awesome.  You can tell it is a 5 star hotel.  We have a suite, which I think will be great to give Konnor room to roam.  It is huge and very swanky.  Our other hotel was nice, but this one is spectacular.  We got partially unpacked last night, had a wonderful breakfast buffet this morning, went to the bank to exchange money, came back and unpacked more and then walked around the area a little bit.  We are right downtown and it is a really nice area.  There are plenty of shops, places to eat and we feel completely safe walking around by ourselves.  We got all Konnor's stuff together and now we are just sitting here trying not to bite our nails off waiting to leave to go get him.  As I finish this up we are 1 hour away from leaving to go meet our Son.  Truthfully we have handled everything really well.  People thought we were crazy b/c we are so calm about everything, but the reason is b/c this morning we are now both really nervous and I know  we would have been a mess if we had felt like this for more than a day.  The next time we post we will have Konnor with us!!!

Ashley

P.S. IT'S GOTCHA DAY!!!

Just before actually walking up onto the Great Wall of China

Ashley on top of a watchtower

Yes we climbed this...and several more

Mark amusing me and posing for yet another photo op

I just love the two little kids running along the wall.  Beautiful!!

15 hours!!!!

We are officially only 15 hours away from Gotcha!!!  I can't believe that we are actually here and this is happening.  It seems really surreal right now.  I keep waiting for all the nerves to kick in, but I am crazy calm.  Very Weird.  I figure it will all kick in tonight when I try to get some sleep.

For as excited as we are there is also a little bit of sadness in this night.  Tonight will be the last night Konnor spends in an orphanage.  The last night he will ever be hungry, cold or scared with noone to comfort him.  It is the last night that he will go without knowing the unconditional love of a forever family.  This makes my heart burst with joy b/c I know the life that is coming for this little boy.  The part that hurts is that it is also the last night he will ever be in an orphanage.  I know right now you are all thinking I am crazy.  We think of orphanages as this big bad scary horrible place.  What we have to remember is that those Nannies and other children are the only family Konnor knows.  The sounds, the smells, the texture of the clothes and the taste of the food are all normal to him.  The things that we find so lacking and awful are his safety net.  It is all he has ever known.  To have these things, these people and this place, suddenly ripped from him is going to be traumatic.  He is going to be thrust into the arms of strangers who don't speak his language, and who don't even know how he eats or when he naps.  As his Mother it breaks my heart to think of how scared he will be.  I know this is best for him.  I know that we can provide things for him that would never have been available otherwise, but I absolutely HATE that he has to go through this scary time.  I wish I could be the fairy Godmother who waives her wand and makes it all better, but I'm not.  All we can do is love him and do the best that we can.

So tonight I ask that you pray for our family.  That Konnor's heart is opened to us and can begin to heal.  I pray that we can be his parents without pushing what we think is right on him, but instead allowing him to show us what he needs.

Thank you for all the support that has gotten us to this place and this day.  We could never have come this far without all of you to help us along the way.  I will try to post about how our day went today before we go to meet Konnor tomorrow.  Our flight was very late today so this is all my fuddled mind could work on right now.

Thank you,

Ashley

Beijing Day 3 (only 1 part this time : )

We met our guide in the lobby at 10.  As soon as we started to head outside you could tell that something important was going on b/c there was a bunch of people.  Of course the one thing in all the commotion that I zeroed in on was Mickey Mouse.  It turned out that it was a Bride and Groom arriving and Mickey was there as part of the festivities.  Candy said that in China they hold all of their weddings early in the morning.  Instead of rice or bubbles, they threw a boat load of confetti in the air, then Mickey handed the couple a bunch of balloons that they released together and watched float away.  It was actually very pretty and they looked so happy. Oh and Yes I did get my picture with Mickey Mouse : )

We then headed to the Lama Temple.  It really is amazing to see.  It was originally built in 1694.  This is still a practicing Buddhist temple.  Candy said that people come here often to pray for various things.  They burn incense and pray in different ways depending on what they are praying for.  The most popular days are the 1st and 15th of every month.  Let me tell you that if you have asthma this is not the place for you.  I got some great pictures, but we were practically the only people there that were not burning incense.  It totally kicked off my allergies and my eyes itched the rest of the day.  We spent the next hour or so just walking around and looking in shops.  We didn't buy anything, but it was a very pretty and a quiet area so it was nice.

After awhile we grabbed a cab to the Summer Palace.  Seriously!!  The forecast said rain today so where are the clouds and stinkin rain.  Needless to say it was sunny and hot!!  I have totally picked up on the whole using an umbrella as shade thing.  It seems like everyone over here uses their umbrellas on sunny days so I caved in to peer pressure and my bright yellow umbrella went up.  It didn't stop me from getting a sunburn though.  We had on SPF 50, but I forgot to reapply.  Anyway.  I am sad to say that I really didn't absorb much at the Summer Palace.  Frankly I was hot, tired and cranky. It is absolutely beautiful though.  There is alot of garden, a huge lake and we took a boat across to a big bridge that has over 500 dragons on it.  You can tell by my vague detail how spaced out I was.  Truthfully the highlight was towards the end where I saw this small group of girls (probably late teens) looking at me and giggling like girls that age do.  Eventually one worked up the courage to ask me for a picture which was fine.  Apparently that gave the other girls some courage b/c then I had to do pictures with every girl individually.  I also had Mark take a picture b/c I finally decided that I don't care if they take my picture, but then it works both ways and I can take theirs too : )  I tell you what, you would think that I was some 6 foot tall, tanned, buff and gorgeous dude with the way these girls were smiling and giggling over these pictures.  It is just funny b/c at home I am average and slightly chubby.  Here I am a ROCK STAR!!! I will always remember that my first experience with a squatty potty was at the Summer Palace.  I was so proud of myself.  Now I have used them several more times and am getting used to it.  I will tell you though that basically they are just disgusting!!!!

Here are some travel tips:  1) there is no such thing as a line in the potty.  It is whoever grabs that door and gets in there first.  Truthfully this can be said for anywhere.  When you are standing in line for something you should basically be a second skin to the person in front of you or someone will cut in (oftentimes by pushing).  This is not considered rude here, it's just the way it is.  2) Yes you do need to carry your own toilet paper with you.  I have actually just been carrying around the little kleenex packs and this works fine.  3) You need to carry hand sanitizer with you everywhere!!!  I have the little bottle and I also carry a few of the hand wipes as well, b/c sometimes you just need that extra clean feel that you don't get with the rub it in kind.

We then took a cab to KFC (Mark liked his chicken, but my sandwhich was totally gross) and then we saw the Acrobats show.  We originally were not going to see the show, but since we have been so tight with our money we figured we could splurge a little.  I love our guide b/c when she asked us if we wanted to go she told us all the ticket prices and then said that really she would recommend the cheap seats b/c even the cheap seats are really good.  She was so right!!  The theatre is pretty small so we were still center and only probably about 30 rows up.  It was a great show.  Short, but really entertaining.  It is amazing how they can do some of those things.  We bought a copper hand painted rabbit ornament to go on our Christmas Tree since Konnor was born in the year of the rabbit.  Mark and I try to get a Christmas ornament whenever we travel so that our Christmas tree is made up of memories.

After that we headed back on the subway to the hotel.  Yesterday and this morning Candy kept saying how much energy we have, but let me just tell you that she totally wore us out today.  We were both exhausted when we got back to the hotel.  We have packed all our luggage except bathroom stuff and the alarm is set for 530.  Tomorrow we are going to the Great Wall in the morning and then we catch a mid day flight to Guangzhou.  By the time we land in Guangzhou we will be less than 24 hours away from Gotcha Day!!!  I can't believe it is so close now.  Off to bed for us tonight.  We are hoping to borrow a cable in Guangzhou so we can upload pictures.  Keeping fingers crossed.  Have a good weekend.

Ashley

Burning incense at the Lama Temple

Lama Temple

Boat made out of marble at the Summer Palace

Picture taking : )

Summer Palace from the boat

Acrobat show

Acrobat show