Heartbroken.......

We are only 10 days away from leaving for China and only 16 days away from meeting our Konnor for the first time.  We have both been running around like crazy people all week trying to get all the last minute stuff done.  We are excited, nervous and just in general really stressed out.  I have several posts in mind that I would like to write in the next week to prepare everyone for how our lives are going to change in the coming months, but today I felt we needed to take a few minutes to turn our thoughts and prayers towards a different purpose.

The further you journey into the adoption process the more you find yourself immersed in adoption everything.  Thankfully there are yahoo groups, facebook pages, blogs and agency groups that connect you with other adoptive parents for support.  The people on these groups become a lifeline for you.  You celebrate all the same milestones with them, because only someone who has been through the process can truly understand how important each of those baby steps are.  You become attached to not only the person on the other end of the screen, but to the child that will soon join their family.  You celebrate with them when they get updated pictures.  You do happy dances when they finally get their travel approval and freely shed tears when you know their heart is breaking.

In the last 2 weeks our own little adoption community has had a great deal of heartbreak.  While we have rejoiced that Konnor would soon have a forever family, these families have mourned because their child will never know the forever family that loved them with all their hearts.  I won't go into specifics as they are not my stories to tell, however, in the last 2 weeks we have had 2 families in our adoption community suddenly lose their child just weeks before they would be traveling to bring them home.  I can't even begin to understand the depth of their grief.  Any of you who know Mark and I understand that Konnor has already become the center of our world and I know that these families loved their children just as much.  I have no words to express how my heart breaks for these families.  Hearing this news this morning has changed my whole perspective about the last week.  I realize now that it does not matter if I get my meals pre-cooked before we leave, if my house is a little messy or if I forget to pack something.  I need to stop and take a few moments to enjoy this time of planning for our Son to come home.  My tears shed freely this morning and I just ask that you please keep these families in your thoughts and prayers as they mourn the losses of these beautiful children.

Ashley

Nonstop flight to China please....

It has been 15 months since we started the adoption process.  There were up, downs, middle ground where nothing happened and days when we questioned our decisions only to be put right back on the path.  All of these things led to a phone call today from our caseworker that said (and I am paraphrasing here) "it's time to go get your Son!"  I was shocked when today we got the call that we have TA (travel approval)!!!  Yes that's right folks, the Hendricks family is going to China.  It has only been 10 days since our Article 5 was picked up, but apparently someone wanted to clean off their desk last week before the weekend : )  So we have requested a gotcha day and a consulate day and will hear back in the next couple days to confirm dates.  Once we get confirmation of date we will book our flights!!!!  I can't believe that we could be holding our little man in just a couple weeks.  So excited.  Ok I have a million things to do tonight so I will update everyone once we get dates set.  Until then WHOOHOO WE GOT TA!!!!

Ashley

Happy Birthday Konnor!!!!!

Yes I know that technically it is still April 17 here, but over in China it is already April 18 which means that our baby boy is now officially 1 year old.  We are both excited and sad about this.  We are very excited, because this will be the only birthday that he spends without a forever family.  We are also sad, because he is still half-way around the world and we can't celebrate this day with him in our arms. And yes we do have some presents for him to open when he gets home!!!

Although we are very excited for Konnor's birthday it is important for us to remember that he also has another family that will be mourning this day.  I would love to be selfish and ignore the fact that he has a birth family, but that is not something that we can do now or ever.  We will never really know or understand the reasons his birth family had for abandoning him that day a year ago.  We could speculate, but ultimately all it would be is guessing, and we don't want Konnor to grown up with a false idea of what may or may not have happened.  What I do know is that on this day for the rest of their lives this other family will think of this little boy.  They will wonder what happened to him.  Is he safe?   Did he find a forever family?  Is he loved?  These are questions that they will never have the answers too.

 My heart aches for this family. I have cried tears for this family and the loss they have endured.  I can't begin to imagine the pain that went into the decision they made.  They will never see what kind of man this little boy will grow up to be. They will never be blessed with his smiles or hugs.  Never be able to watch him as he learns new things and meets new people.   I will never be able to tell them how much he is loved, or how much we appreciate the sacrifice they made.  So on this day every year we will celebrate the birth of our Son.  We will have parties, laugh and have cake fights : )   But there will always be an extra prayer on our lips for this other family halfway around the world.  We will always remember them and pray that they have peace with the decision they made. 

We got an update!!!!!

We got an update from the orphanage today.  Konnor seems to be growing well.  I can't believe how big he has gotten.  He is about 16.5 pounds and almost 28 inches.  I am meeting with the Pediatrician tomorrow so I am really excited to have updated measurements to give her.  These pictures will be the only ones taken around his 1st birthday so they are truly appreciated.  

Article 5 Pickup, YIPPPEEEE!!!

So our Article 5 has been picked up from the American Embassy in Guangzhou.  What does this mean you may ask???????  It means that we are OFFICIALLY WAITING ON TA (Travel Approval)!!!!  Yes I love exclamation points, but this is soooo exciting : )  We are on the downward slope now and are just waiting on our travel approval which is basically them saying "come get him!"  On average it takes 2-3 weeks to get your TA, however in the last 2 weeks people have been getting them in 10-14 days.  We are keeping fingers crossed for a short TA wait.  In theory if all goes well we should be on a plane to China within 2-3 weeks of getting TA.  I pretty much told our caseworker to just get the first available date possible and if I have to swim to China then so be it because I will not make him spend one second longer than absolutely necessary without his forever family.  That means we should be traveling sometime in May (fingers crossed).

Since we are getting so close to leaving we have really had to buckle down and start getting stuff done around here.  Today is paint Konnor's room day.  Tommorow is Orphans and Adoptions Conference...for anyone interested in attending please see www.inhishandsorphans.org for details...   Hopefully in the next week we can get the carpets cleaned.  Yes I have started compiling all of our stuff for travel.  Mostly just the basics.  I am waiting to start packing his clothes until we get another update (our agency has requested one).  I am meeting with the Pediatrician next Tuesday to talk about his plan of care.  I am trying to run thru all the food in our house so that the week prior to leaving I can start from scratch and precook a bunch of stuff.  Anyone with good recipes that freeze well please give me a shout.    Oh the list goes on and on.  Keep checking back because I know there are a couple more posts coming in the next week.

Happy Friday!!!!!

Ashley

Why??

This is a story that is well known in the adoption community, but I thought I would post it here for those that have never heard it.  

                                             Starfish Story

Once upon a time there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day he was walking along the shore. As he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day.

So he began to walk faster to catch up. As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead he was reaching down to the shore, picking up something and very gently throwing it into the ocean.

As he got closer he called out, "Good morning! What are you doing?"

The young man paused, looked up and replied, "Throwing starfish in the ocean." I then asked, "Why are you throwing starfish in the ocean?"

"The sun is up and the tide is going out. And if I don't throw them in they'll die."

"But, young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach and starfish all along it. You can't possibly make a difference!"

The young man listened politely. Then bent down, picked up another starfish and threw it into the ocean, past the breaking waves and said - "It made a difference for that one."

If you are interested in adoption or if you want to learn ways that you can help the millions of orphaned children worldwide, I would encourage you to attend this years Orphan and Adoption Conference being held at Lakeside Christian Church, Springfield, IL on April 14 from 9-430.  For details please visit www.inhishandsorphans.org